Month Ten

Well, here I am, good and pregnant, and have been such a negligent blogger.  I know I will probably regret not doing a better job of keeping track of the past several months, but honestly I feel like there's just really not that much to tell.  I know that sounds crazy, but things have been... uneventful. 

I like being pregnant.  I'm happier. I love feeling her move around.  I am going to be sad when I don't have that feeling anymore.  When I don't have her, all to myself, tucked up safe inside where I know where she is and what she's doing at all times.  When I no longer have so much control.

 There is only one reason I want her to come out any earlier than her due date, and that is so I can quit coming to the office. :)

There have been no signs that she's interested in coming out any time soon. I'm not dilated a bit.  Of course, they say that means nothing, I could still go into labor "at any time."  But I'm pretty sure I shouldn't expect her early.  Or on time.

I keep waiting for my nesting instinct to truly kick in, so I get the last little bits of her room finished. There are two pieces of furniture that need to be painted (Fella is supposed to do them, but I made the mistake of letting him know that my mom said that she and my stepdad would paint them if they remained undone when they get to town in 2 weeks, so I don't know if they will get done).  There are a few more of the THINGS that we need to have relatively soon.  Like a bathtub and baby wipes. And a few more of the things that we need less urgently, like extra bases for the car seat so all the baby's various chauffeurs have one. But we have all the things that are, like, REQUIRED.  The car seat, since they won't let us leave the hospital with her otherwise, and it would suck to have to leave her behind.  And we have a place for her to sleep.  And we have clothes, diapers, and boobs. Should be all set.

Can't believe how close it is.  Can't believe I'm about to be somebody's mother.  Can't believe that the whole world is about to morph and change color...

Thirty

Thirty weeks!  Thirty weeks already.  It's going so fast...

I want to clarify that when I said I never thought I'd be a SAHM, it wasn't because I didn't think I'd WANT to be, but because I never thought I'd be able to be.  I just grew up thinking moms worked (unless they were totally wealthy or something) and that's how it would be.  Of course, my own mother did not have that option and so I guess I didn't think of it.  I would LOVE to not work.  But it also scares me, for several reasons, including 1) whether it will be difficult to return to work if/when I want to and 2) depending on a man for income and having no money of my own FREAKS ME RIGHT OUT.  But I would definitely like to consider finding something that is 1) less stressful and 2) allows for part-time.  We shall see.  Fella is of the opinion that if I work for a few more years I could quit work forever, which sounds AWESOME, but I might rather quit for a few years now and go back later when she's in school.  Maybe?  Maybe we'll find a happy part-time medium.

So.  I heard on one of my pregnancy podcasts that you should sing your baby a song every day while you're pregnant, and they will not only know your voice, but the song itself and will recognize it after they are born and you should sing it to them again in the first hour after birth.  So I'm singing "Songbird," every day.  Usually while I'm in the shower (so the baby will probably only recognize it if the water is running, lol) and it just popped into my head when I tried to think of something to be The Song.  I hope she likes it.

We bought a rocker/recliner for the rocking/feeding, and new couches (actually a sectional) because we needed wanted them.  The crib is now assembled, which is a step in the right direction. We are painting the furniture that will go in the nursery next weekend (I've been saying that for a few weekends now, but really and truly NEXT WEEKEND), and the only thing we absolutely, desperately NEED is a car seat, since they won't let us take her home from the hospital without one. 

10 weeks to go...

Third

Third trimester, that is.

It's here. I can't believe it. This is going by too quickly.

I still feel pretty good. I've noticed an uptick in Tums consumption, I'm a little extra tired, my back hurts at night, and suddenly my work desk chair that has always been perfectly fine has started being uncomfortable (for my rear, not my back). Otherwise, no major complaints.  Oh! And restless leg.  Other than THAT, no major complaints.

My rate of weight gain has really picked up over the past couple weeks, but I'm still within the rough guidelines my doctor gave me.  I already have concerns about having a huge baby (please see Fella's birth weight of 10 lbs 12 oz) so I have been trying not to gain too much. 

I still haven't done the nursery.  It has always seemed we have had plenty of time, and now I'm suddenly quite anxious about it. Fella promises we will take care of it over Memorial Day weekend.  We need to paint furniture and put the crib together and move some non-baby stuff out of her room.  

I'm losing interest in work altogether.  Not a good sign for how well I'll be able to focus when she's here. Being a stay at home mom is not something I ever thought I'd be able do-- my whole life, I just assumed I would always work, and it's not still not anyone's first choice for our finances.  But considering how every morning I always wish I could stay home with Max and the kitties I can only imagine it will be worse when it's an actual human baby...

Otherwise life is just moving along... sometimes I feel like we're just sitting on the tracks and a train's coming through.  In 81 days. Give or take. 

Fail

Well.  I am a complete failure at even the blogging once a week thing. Remember when I posted multiple times a day? 

Anyway, I guess though there is a lot to tell, there's not much to tell.  Pregnancy is going smoothly, I am incredibly lucky in that regard.  My back hurts a little, yeah yeah, and pooping would be nice, but whatever.  I'm just along for the ride here, and it's not been a bumpy one.  We've chosen a doula, we take our babymoon this week, baby bedding has been delivered (though not unpacked, because the crib is still not put together and there is still a guest bed in the baby's room) and things are moving right along.  I can't believe that I'm almost done with my second trimester.  The time has gone really quickly.  And I don't want it to.

I like being pregnant (for the moment, I know, the third trimester will be different, especially the end, but I like it for now). I'm not anxious (way less than during wedding planning), I'm not physically uncomfortable, strangers smile at me in public, other attorneys are unusually nice to me, my friends and co-workers are overly accommodating when it comes to carrying things/taking the only chair/choosing the restaurant...I've gained exactly along the weight guidelines my doctor gave me at the beginning, I passed my glucose screen with flying colors, the baby is measuring right and kicking right and and doing EVERYTHING right so far (thank you God); I am pretty good at this pregnant thing.  I am a pregnancy ROCK STAR.  This thing, I got it handled, at least so far.  Now, when she comes OUT, that part will not be so easy to master, so can't she just stay in there?